Remember That Club Scene From "Blade"?

I'm a Vampire / Future Bible Heroes

Definitely the best song by any Magnetic Fields side project. Imagine Stephen Dorff, John Malkovich, Tom Cruise, Eddie Murphy, and one of the blood-suckers from the Buffy movie (not starring Sarah Michelle Gellar) all dancing together at an impossibly glam Halloween party hosted by Stephin Merritt. The eternal Claudia Gonson is onstage singing, and it sounds like this.

I'm a Vampire (extended version) / Future Bible Heroes

The remix is inferior, but it's longer and the extra minutes are appreciated. It's also further dancified and adds a nice "Ba-ba-ba-ba" backing vocal from the Vampiress herself. Still, if I was gonna remix this treasure, I'd just copy & paste it after itself and title the project "I'm 2 Vampires." Go here to buy Eternal Youth. Yeah, it's that easy.